How Do We Write an Obituary?
← Memorial Resources · By Rock Pifer · Last reviewed November 2026
Somebody in the family usually gets handed this job.
Maybe it's you.
And you're sitting there with a blank page, wondering how you're supposed to fit a whole life into a few paragraphs.
Take a breath. An obituary doesn't have to be perfect. It has to be true, and it has to sound like them.
What an Obituary Does
An obituary does two things.
It lets people know that someone has died, and when and where the service will be.
And it tells, in a few lines, who that person was.
The Basic Information
Most obituaries include:
Full name, including a nickname if they went by one
Age, and the town where they lived
Date and place of death
Date and place of birth
Close family members, both living and those who died before them
Service details: the date, time, and place
Where to send memorial donations, if the family prefers them to flowers
Some families choose not to list the cause of death. That's your decision. You don't owe anyone that information.
Then Tell Who They Were
This is the part that matters most.
Ask the same questions I've always asked families before a service. What did they love to do? What was their work? Did they hunt and fish? Were they a good cook? Who was their football team? What did they always say?
A line like "He never met a stranger, and he never left a job half done" tells people more than a long list of dates.
Use the words the family uses when they talk about them. If everybody called him "Bud," call him Bud.
Keep It Simple
You don't need fancy language. Write the way you'd talk if you were telling a friend about them.
Short sentences are fine. A little humor is fine, if they had a sense of humor.
If the obituary is going in the newspaper, ask about the cost first. Many papers charge by the line or by the word, and the price can add up. A shorter print version with a fuller version on the funeral home's website is a common choice.
Ask Someone to Read It
Before it goes out, have at least one other family member read it.
Check the spelling of every name. Check the dates. Check the service time and address twice.
Make sure nobody important was left out of the family list. That's the mistake that hurts feelings the most.
A Simple Pattern
If you're stuck, start here:
[Name], [age], of [town], passed away on [date] at [place]. Born on [date] in [place], [he/she] [one or two sentences about their life, work, faith, and what they loved].
[He/She] is survived by [family]. [He/She] was preceded in death by [family].
A celebration of life will be held on [date] at [time] at [place]. In lieu of flowers, the family asks that memorial donations be made to [organization].
Then go back and add the things that make it sound like them.
That's the part people will remember.
Related Questions
Next step: How Do I Write and Give a Eulogy?